The Saint

Review by Shaggy Bob

Shaggy Bob may possibly have the biggest ego, but it's backed with the wisdom beyond any mortal means. He has answers to all questions. And he's never wrong. Well, so we are lead to believe. And don't let him get started on "women -- source of all evil" or else you'll never hear the end. You've been warned.

There I was, chillin', and what do I get? This @#$ starts to honk from behind me, just because I'm stopped at an intersection. Of course there was no room for me to cross the intersection without blocking it. But did it matter to the @$$ in a SUV? It's not like he couldn't see over me. I know being stupid isn't a crime but when stupidity starts to bother other people, then it ought to be.

Speaking of seeing through things, THE SAINT came out and I had to go check it out. It's about this professional theif who was contracted out to retrieve the formula for the cold fusion. And no, he doesn't use lots of prostetics like in Mission Impossible but just bit of hair and different accents and mannerisms. And yes, I do believe Val Kilmer may be suffering from multiple personality disorder.

No nakkid boobs. 3 doz bullets. 4 dead bodies. 31 on the vomit meter. No moon shots. What we got here are: good ol' Catholic leraning institution-fu, magic trick-fu, attack of killer dog-fu, kiss from hell-fu, thermo wet suit-fu, button-fu, free fall-fu, lip stick from hell-fu, altimate nerd-fu, secret compartments-fu, and of course the light show of the most inexpensive kind-fu. Video Hall of Fame nomination for Val Kilmer for saying stuff like "do you love me" and to Elisabeth Shue for saying is like "this is gonna hurt" and to Rade Serbedzija for saying stuff like "when did you receive your last pay check". Two stars. Shaggy Bob says wicked!

Spoilers -- What we have here is a guy who have whole mess of different identities, all named after Catholic saints. And no major prestestics or anything like that is used either. It's all from mannerisms and bit of hair. And results are really cool. Of course, it might help when the actor is suffering from schizophrenia may help. And no, Elizabeth Shue does not use any of the techno babble so we have no idea if she's the real scientist or not. Then again, she's too cute to be a real nerd. No super human powers. But how someone who came up with cold fusion can still remain alive is mind boggling to me 'cause you know they're gonna get assassinated before their work is completed.

If you're waiting for that phone call from Cameron Diaz, and you know she has your number, maybe you can wait for this flick to come out in the video. You don't necessarily have to see it on the big screen to get jist of it. But then are you sure she has your number?

Alien Alert! I know I don't have all the facts but after the freeway got torn down, the number of hit and run accidents and red light running has increased dramatically. People are adding at least 20 min to their commute but the trasportation dept doesn't think there's any major problems. And they want to knock down some more? Are they @#$en high from that medicinal marijuana?!

Internet Movie Database
More info about The Saint at the Internet Movie Database

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