where things went wrong

where things went wrong

life
gets more screwy
every day

and I don't like it

I liked it better
when I didn't have to play dodge 'em
on the highway
with all the beam-me-up-scotties
with cell phones in their ears

I liked it better
when the crazy person on the sidewalk
talking to the air
really was a crazy person talking to the air
and not a dweeb yuppie
talking to his dweebette girlfriend
on some kind of phone thing too small
for me to even see

I liked it better when men were hard
and women were soft and cars had fins
and the president was smarter than the
average dumbass drunk at the corner bar

I liked it better
when Desi loved lucy
and Georgeous George was the meanest guy
in tv wrestling

I liked it better
when a microwave
was what your girlfriend did
when she was across the room with her parents

I liked it better
when I was young

a real up-and-comer

and the pretty girl on the park bench
was waiting for me